Candy Psychologist
by jumping off of rocky cliffs
Summary: You chose the "love", so I ate the "lie". Narrative!songfic, oneshot.


**Name:** Candy Psychologist

**Words:** Eight hundred forty seven.

**Character(s):** Kagamine Rin (Vocaloid).

**Summary:** Caught in a downpour, a girl in love makes a decision. Mainly an abstract character study.

**Credits:** la lucarne © 2011

**Notes:** My first real drabble for a canon character in any fandom. Yeah, it's a big leap for me. I'm more used to writing OCs, but since Vocaloids are rather neutral in terms of personality, it's hard to play them wrong, right? Anyways, Candy Psychologist by Chocho is a pretty awesome song, and it's criminally underappreciated. Catchy beat notwithstanding, the lyrics are interesting and up to interpretation. Here's my attempt.

=o=o=o=o=

She was cold.

The rain wasn't a storm yet, but it was a needle-like pounding against her bare skin. Her clothing was unsuitable for the weather: sure, the orange dress and black hat looked cute inside, but sudden deluges were known to do wonders on one's appearance. That, and her arms were bare to the cold rain, leaving them trembling like the autumn leaves falling around her.

Cars hurriedly scraped the the road in front of her, sending up small geysers of water at her. She shot them a withering glance, but it was half-hearted. The weather had already put a damper on her spirits. It wasn't like she was going to even think of improving her mood now.

How could things go so wrong now? she thought. It was just a simple date, to be completely honest. She had found him alone at the end of the day, when everyone else was leaving school. A conciliatory bow and apology, the confession stumbling from her lips, and concluding with the rushed offer to go out to a café the coming Saturday.

Her friends had all laughed her off when they had heard her plans. He's never going to fall for it, they said. Everyone's asked him out, so why would you be any different?

Of course, they were summarily stunned when he smiled and accepted her offer. Right then and there, her heart was giddily dancing in her chest, doing some sort of unearthly tarantella. Her brain dropped any other priorities, and her mouth started relaying information without a second thought. What did he want to do? Where should they meet? The time flew by her in those moments, leaving her alone in her bliss.

Now, she was alone, but for a different reason. She was twisted into a little cocoon of wetness and doubt. The café was _there_, just two blocks down. She could see the inviting tendrils of light wrap out from under the awnings and twine around her, but in this state, how could she impress him?

She almost subconsciously slipped a hand into her bag. The slender digits looked for an umbrella, but instead found... candy? Two cellophane-wrapped spheres juggled themselves around her fingertips, each begging to be chosen over the other. She didn't know when she had placed them in there, but she knew the flavors. One cherry, one lemon. One sweet, one sour.

Decisions, decisions. Even though the promise of food was just ahead, her stomach demanded with a none-too-subtle growl something to satiate it. She sighed. The spheres wouldn't settle anything at all, and yet...

At that fleeting instant, the rain froze around her as she saw him step out the café door and under the awning. He was too far away: there was no way he could see her. She could hide in plain sight. However, she couldn't do it for long. Soon (in two minutes, to be exact) their planned time would roll by, and then she'd be late. And she couldn't be late to her first date.

Maybe it was just that she was paralyzed by the miniature storm, unable to seek shelter, but she knew she'd have to do something soon. The fine hairs on her exposed arms pricked up. Her heart felt like there was no skin and bone blocking it, that its every quiver was on display. Her breath quickened.

There was no way she could just leave him behind. He was the guy she had been following alone for the past two years. She had spent countless hours unfolding and arranging the _perfect_ words to say to him. She had strode up to him at that fateful time and confessed. She could do this. She had the guts.

The candies slipped around her fingers again.

But, there was no way she could continue. He was the guy who was too popular for her, the guy who everyone said was too good. Her friends dissuaded her, and although she didn't know why back then, she knew now. Everyone else could see it. She didn't have the guts.

She bit her lip, and the faintest signs of tears started to appear. No matter which she chose, she couldn't just stand here and look like a dumbstruck fool. A decision had to be made, and within the next 30 seconds. It wasn't going to be of battling back and forth, so the only way was to leave it up to chance.

Sighing, she battled both her stomach's acidic gurgles and her pounding chest and grasped the sphere on the right. The crinkling plastic came off like a glove, and without looking, she popped the candy into her mouth.

Sour blossomed in her mouth. Lemon. That settled it.

Turning on her heel and doing her best to ignore the lights behind her and her tears, she hurried back to the bus stop. Each step slapped up water against her calves, but she didn't care. She knew that rumors would spread come Monday, but she didn't care. The decision was made.

She loved him. Just not yet.


End file.
